its not perfect...but it might as well be

I havent written in ages...i have been busy...yes...busy living the life i finally got...the one i dreamt about for so long, the one i was supposed to have...and somehow never happened...

And i must say its a nice feeling, to wake up in the morning and be glad to get out of bed, to not remember the last time you shed tears, to have your pillow dry... its fu*in great! i never believed it could happen to me...and it did...

And there are mornings, when a cloud passes through my mind and makes me think, why did i wait so long to make the step? why didnt i left before? maybe my life could have started earlier...and sometimes my mind darkens, my eyes feel moist, but i stand up and face the world, and remember that a mistake, even if i had to make it 1000 times to learn, a mistake makes you stronger and makes you understand where you dont want to go.

And the past doesnt leave you , quiete often comes back, in a nightmare, in a thought....what if...he leaves me out in the cold like the other one did......but then i look beside me and there is this certainity inside my heart, that makes me believe, makes me unafraid of jumping with him...

and as the days go by, im happy.....although the little devil inside my head asks me...once in a blue moon : are you going in the fast lane with a tricycle? can you keep up the race?

and i stop....and smile....whatever will come to myh life can come...i know that for now...the tunnel has ended..